Monday, 16 April 2012


It's been nearly a month since I left London and returned to Shropshire and to be honest, I'm finding it hard to re-adjust from "city life", which is strange, given that I've spent most of my life in the countryside.

When I initially moved down there in January, I struggled. It was a huge shock, suddenly living in London. It was totally different to visiting the place and it hit me hard, yet I soon got used to it and as tough as certain aspects turned out to be, I found I was able to cope, on the whole (apart from the astronomical prices for certain things, such as... practically everything, including bland sandwiches from short-changing bastards in denial...) with being in the capital.

It's true that I did stick out like Chris Moyles in a room full of talented people some of the time - especially when I was unashamedly trying to impress someone and I pointed out the "cute" mouse scuttling between the rails on the underground, as if it was a rare sight - but I soon realised that most of the things I found surprising (including the violence I experienced) are pretty standard things for your average Londoner and just make you look a bit silly (or like a colossal twat gun if it's something bigger, like shit-loads of emergency vehicles speeding through the traffic etc.) if you draw upon them.

But once I got over my feelings about having to move back to Shropshire and everything, I found it an even bigger shock to be back in an environment that does draw attention to such things as mice and sudden bursts of sirens and blue flashing lights. Not to mention the lack of traffic noise in a lot of places, along with a severely restricted rail service and a practically non-existent bus service. Of course, there is no real point in comparing Shropshire to London, as they are naturally two very different places, but I'm surprised at how quickly I adjusted to being in the big city and how odd I feel being back in the county I have been in since I was just over a year old.

Don't get me wrong, I like being in a silent environment as much as I love being in the city and I know that being in a city isn't for everyone, in much the same way being in the countryside isn't, but I'm starting to wonder if it's some kind of sign. Maybe being born in a city has left a huge imprint on me that means no matter how much I like the countryside and the peaceful nature it often has, I'm a city person at heart and as a result, I feel more at home there.

At the end of the day, all of this could be bollocks due to confusion and over-thinking. I'm struggling to find a job and I'm sort of "drifting" at the moment, though even I'm not sure what I mean by saying that.

See? The mind is a very strange place, as I'm sure anyone can testify, but right now, mine is a particularly strange bastard.

1 comment:

Aya Vandenbussche said...

You should read Kafka, though it can be depressing. The point is that Kafka had mixed feelings about the city and the countryside. He lived in the city and liked it, but it could get too much for him. Than he would go and stay for a while in the country and felt overwhelmed and oppressed by all the nature around him. He couldn't handle that.
Woody Allen is very much the same. Lives in the city and has a mixture of awe and dislike to the country.

You can be ambivalent, it's cool.